"Looking Back" is a feature in which I choose a previous blog which I have written, rewrite it and share it once again. This one was first posted in 2013.
Did you ever take one of those personality tests that labels you one of four types or a mixture of two? There are many of those tests around and they use different labels that mean the same thing.
The last one that I took was at Awana Commanders College and one that Awana uses. It labels you as one of four colors. It was especially interesting because after our color was identified, we were given a group project to complete. And after working with our group for several hours it was very easy to see all four colors at work in the individuals in our group. It really helped us to see the theory applied.
Now these tests show that I am an analyzer, organizer, and administrator, and that is certainly true. That certainly coordinates with my interest and experience in mathematics and computers. But it also shows that I am not very verbal and there is some truth to that. I do like to write, but most of my 30+ years experience in working for newspapers involved writing where I wasn't rushed. I could analyze and organize and then write.
The same is true of my blogs. However, I'm not sure how I can justify that completely with my experience in the classroom. For some reason, when I was in the classroom, my verbal deficiencies never bothered me. They would come alive. I thoroughly enjoyed teaching and miss it to this day. Of , I taught math which was very logical. And I think I handled myself well when I was leading our family ministry or when I lead hymn sings, etc. But in those cases, I do prepare most of my comments in advance.
I do not enjoy playing most games, especially those where you must perform before the group or those that involve things like trivia and fast thinking. I need time to analyze and just don't enjoy being pressured to perform or come up with a quick answer. I avoid them whenever I can. But give me a problem or puzzle where I have time to analyze it and I will work and most likely solve it.
I once heard a Bible teacher, who was like me, say he was sure that there won't be games in heaven. I've often hoped that he was right.
Now besides my dislike for games, my verbal limitations make me cringe when I need to participate in group discussions, including Bible studies. Folks who are verbal can quickly respond while I sit there listening and analyzing before I am willing to make a response.
For about a dozen years I had to participate in a monthly administrative discussion group. The majority of the participants were very verbal folks who always had responses, while I would sit and analyze. My boss, who was very verbal but not very analytical, used to chastise me because I didn't participate more. I dreaded those sessions and the pressure put on me to perform like all the verbal participants. That boss wasn't very tolerant of learning styles that were different from his and I had to learn to accept that.
Now this might shock you, but I also don't enjoy praying in public or even in small groups. It isn't because I don't believe in prayer, because I certainly do. It isn't because I don't share the needs of others, because I certainly do. And I do pray regularly - by myself - and I know that God hears me. But I often find it difficult to quickly find the right words to pray out loud when others are listening. So many folks, especially women, can just pray so beautifully, finding all the right words and phrases to convey their requests. Not me. Sometimes I think others must feel that I am not very spiritual when I don't volunteer to pray publicly. But does the Lord find their public prayers more important than my private ones? I really don't think so.
Now why am I sharing this personal information with you? The older I get, the more aware I am becoming of differences in personalities and learning styles. God did not make us all the same - fortunately. But so often we try to force everyone into our mold and we judge them because they aren't the same as us.
That is a real challenge for the classroom teacher and I had to recognize this since those who were analyzers like me often excelled in math. Those who were verbal or had different learning styles would struggle if I, as their teacher, didn't recognize and adjust to this. But whether you are style yellow, red, green, blue or some other label, God made you as you are, for a particular reason.
