Fwd: Things Only A Mom Could Teach

          I know the official Mother's Day is now over for another year, but I thought you might enjoy some of the memories that most of us have about our mothers.  Actually, everyday should be Mother's Day so I guess this blog is still appropriate. So here are some things our mothers taught us.

*     My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION: "Just wait until your father gets home."

*     My Mother taught me about RECEIVING:. "You are going to get it when we get home!"

*    My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE:   "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you ... Don't talk back to me!"

*    My Mother taught me LOGIC:  "Because I said so, that's why."  and also  "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

*    My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE:   "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

*    My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD:  "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

*    My Mother taught me ESP:   "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

*    My Mother taught me HUMOR:   "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

*    My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:   "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

*    My Mother taught me about GENETICS:    "You're just like your father."

*    My Mother taught me about my ROOTS:   "Do you think you were born in a barn?"

*    My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE:   "When you get to be my age, you will understand."

*    My Mother taught me about JUSTICE:   "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you'll see what it's like."

*    My mother taught me RELIGION: "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

*    My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:  "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

*    My mother taught me FORESIGHT:  "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

*    My mother taught me IRONY:  "Keep crying and I'll *give* you something to cry about."

*    My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS:    "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

*    My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:   "Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

*    My mother taught me about STAMINA:  "You'll sit there until all that spinach is finished."

*    My mother taught me about WEATHER:   "It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

*    My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:   "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

*    My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:  "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: Don't Exaggerate!!!"

*    My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:   "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

*    My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:    "Stop acting like your father!"

*    My mother taught me about ENVY:   "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

          Thank you mother for all the valuable lessons you taught us!