Sunday Humor

Over the years there have been many collections of church bulletin bloopers.  Many of them have been included in my blogs.  But here is another list which includes both new ones and some shared before.  Hopefully you will get a few laughs here rather than in your Sunday service.

 

~ The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience. 

 

~ The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's "Hamlet" in the church basement on Friday at 7 pm. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy. 

 

~ A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in honor of his wife. 

 

~ The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church. 

 

~ The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done. 

 

~ Evening massage: 6 p.m. 

 

~ The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning. 

 

~ The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession. 

 

~ Thursday at 5:00 pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in his study. 

 

~ Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 pm. Please use the back door. 

 

~ Ushers will eat latecomers. 

 

~ The third verse of "Blessed Assurance" will be sung without musical accomplishment. 

 

~ Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience." 

 

~ Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice. 

 

~ Stewardship Offertory: "Jesus Paid It All" 

 

~ The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her. 

 

~ In the church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD! Dr. Hargreaves is better. 

 

~ Don't miss this Saturday's exhibit by Christian Martian Arts... 

 

~ The agenda was adopted...the minutes were approved...the final secretary gave a grief report.

 

~ For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs

~The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

~ The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

~ During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

~ Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale.  It is a good chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.  Bring your husbands.

~ An announcement in a church bulletin for a National Prayer & Fasting Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer conference includes meals."