Helicopter Parents

People have often asked me how I thought students changed over the 39 years that I was in education.  That question was always hard to answer because conditions had changed so much over the years.  More students now stay in school.  More opportunities and advanced courses are available.  Technology has changed so much.  Standardized testing and government interference have increased greatly. And parents and home life have changed radically.  Single parent families are now common.  Kids go home to empty houses.  Conditions have changed, but I'm not sure if students have changed that much.  However I do feel that many are now more immature.  And much of this I blame on parents.  In my opinion they have become more involved, demanding, and defensive concerning their children.   Teachers and schools are now blamed for many student problems and shortcomings in parenting.  It wasn't unusual, later in my 39 years in education, for parents to defend their child's lack of effort and failure to meet deadlines.  They often demanded special assignments and extra attention.  Many intervened in situations when the students should have been conferring with the teacher and taking the responsibility for their actions.  For that reason I was not surprised when I recently read an article in the local newspaper with the title "Helicopter parents swoop in on adult children's job hunts, too". The article began by describing a "polished well-dressed woman (who) went booth to booth (at a job fair) passing out resumes, asking about job openings.  Not for herself, however.  For her son. He just graduated.  He has a degree.  He's sharp.  He doesn't know what he wants to do, but I think he'd be good at human resources."  Claudia Buck, the author, says "For baby-boomer parents, who have diligently - some would say obsessively - followed their children from diapers to diplomas, that encounter was perhaps the next logical phase of the so-called "helicopter parenting."  To back up our opinion she shared a 2007 survey of 725 U.S. employers who interview college seniors for jobs.  23 percent of them reported that parents "sometimes" or "very often" get involved.  Here's how:  Attending the interview - 4%; Advocating for promotion/ salary increase - 6%; Negotiating salary/benefits - 9%;  Making interview arrangements - 12%; Complaining if son or daughter isn't hired - 15%; Attending career fair - 17%; Promoting their child to company hiring managers or officials - 26%; Submitting resume on student's behalf - 31%; Obtaining information on company - 40%.  Now I spent nearly 36 years hiring math teachers. Here is my statistic.  Chances of me hiring you if your parents got directly involved - 0%.  I wanted teachers who could speak for themselves and be responsible, not still controlled by their "loving" parents.  I guess some parents will never let their "children" grow up and take responsibility.  It is hard to see your children get rejected, but it is a life lesson that they need to learn.  For that's the way life is.  Well, after reading this article, I realize that my feelings about interfering parents weren't just the result of growing older.  Many others are experiencing the same thing.  Cover them in prayer.  Give them helpful advice.  But let them loose to learn real life lessons and make their way to success or to failure.