Memories And Changes

We've not had a chance to get back to visit Sunbury since January. So on Thursday we decided we just needed to take a break and visit once again. We started by taking Dianne's stepmother out for breakfast. We went to our favorite breakfast spot on the road to Kramer, the Peppertree. As always, no atmosphere, very loud, but the best country breakfast anywhere. I love to stop there. Later we visited Dianne's parent's grave to see if the engraving was completed. It is in the cemetery where I worked digging graves - with just a shovel - during my college years. We had time to walk around and look at tombstones of many former friends and members of our former church. Many great memories. Then we drove to the parsonage where I lived during my first year and to the church we used to attend - where my grandfather ministered for 22 years, where I was dedicated to the Lord and where we were later married. The church building is destined to be a daycare center and it was locked so unfortunately we couldn't get in. But it was in very poor condition. We remembered the hot Sundays when the only air conditioning was opening the church windows where you could see the back porches of the row houses which were next door. I recalled how as a college student I used to get a ride to town early and then crawl in the basement window of the church to study until it was time for prayer meeting to begin. The old parsonage and yard are now gone and a new house is there which looks nothing like the old parsonage. Then we drove down to the neighborhood where my mother and her family used to live. It was not a great neighborhood but the house is still there, as is the front porch where we used to enjoy the swing as we recklessly banged it against the house. The neighborhood store where we used to buy delicious "cho-chos" is now gone as is the one where we used to go to buy comic books. The Horn Railroad is also gone. My mother's father, Pappy Wise, used to walk this everyday as he went to work making caskets. The casket building is now gone as well. We drove out to see what used to be a beautiful park-life property where Dianne grew up and her dad had his water business. Now it is trashy and filled with weeds. Sad, sad, sad, actually depressing! Next we drove to the neighborhoods where some of Dianne's family lived - some of these areas had changed very little, but the farm where her mother grew up is now a beautiful vineyard. Probably the only change that we saw that day which was an actual improvement. The main street of town which used to be thriving with stores and farmer's markets is now a sad site. The bank where Dianne used to work has changed only in name and the Daily Item where I used to work on the editorial staff is still there, as is the old prison a block away. The old library where I had done some research work has been replaced with a modern facility. Our final stop was to an office, where as we waited for our appointment, we saw a neat painting of a snowy scene along the main street of town, the way it used to be. It was a still and beautiful scene. And maybe that is the way we wish to remember it. So many great memories of great years in our lives. Changes happen and are to be expected, but unfortunately they aren't always for the good. But hopefully the mind pictures of how it used to be will never go away.

The Beauty of God's Creation

How can you not believe that there is a Creator? Could this beauty just develop by itself?

Some of the beauty found in our yard.

Father's Day 2009

Tomorrow is Father's Day. It will be a difficult day for me. It will be the first Father's Day that I no longer have a living father-in-law, a father, or even my brother who was a great father. I will especially miss being able to wish my father a happy Father's Day and to sit down and just talk with him. I really miss those special discussions because dad had such great wisdom. Tomorrow will even be more difficult because it would have also been dad's birthday - number 92. We probably would have gone to Wendy's to eat, after church. I enjoyed those weekly times together. Quite often on his birthday we would be together at Pinebrook, but Pinebrook starts a week later this year. There we would celebrate his birthday with Kendy's family and Craig's family, enjoying cake and homemade ice cream. Two years ago we celebrated his 90th birthday a few days later, on July 3, when almost the entire family met at his home in Lititz. It was a special day with many great memories. Now all I have are those great memories and pictures. My father was a special person and I wish that I could thank him once again. We had a special relationship. He never attended events that I was in when I was growing up, mainly because he was busy working several jobs to put food on the table. And, I understood that. He never commended me or said he was proud of me, but I knew he was. I've since found out that our lives and activities were so very similar that he probably expected I would do those things and do them well, just as he had. But none of this ever bothered me because he showed me God through his life and he was my hero for that reason. Earlier this week I heard a song that brought tears to my eyes. I wish I could share it with my father tomorrow on Father's Day. If these words are true in your life, please tell your dad this tomorrow. "Thank you dad for showing me the Father, I see His love in everything you do. Like a clear reflection in the water, I've always seen the Father in you. (1) Through the years you've painted me the picture of a heavenly father I could see. His loving ways became so familiar, because dad you made the Father real to me. Thank you dad for showing me the Father, I see His love in everything you do. Like a clear reflection in the water, I've always seen the Father in you. (2) You sang the grand old hymns and read the story. Every night you prayed on bended knee. Following your steps I've seen the Father, and His amazing grace now lives in me. Thank you dad for showing me the Father, I see His love in everything you do. Like a clear reflection in the water, I've always seen the Father in you." ....... So, dad, in case you can hear or see me, thank you and have a very Happy Birthday and a great Father's Day as you share it with your Heavenly Father who you modeled to me.

Some Heavy Questions

Here are a few heavy things I've been wondering about today .... We were at Roots Auction yesterday and we saw a stand advertising genuine Mexican food. The stand was operated by Amish! Are there really Amish from Mexico? .... Would you risk buying from them with the Swine Flu epidemic? .... Why can't the Phillies win at home? Should they play all their games away? .... Why does the price of oil go up each year just at the time that people want to go on vacation and just at the time when oil distributors are setting their prices for winter heating oil? .... Do gas station operators call each other early in the morning to all agree to raise their prices 15 cents that day? ... Does anybody really believe that the election in Iran was fair and counted correctly? ... What did people do before there were games to play on Facebook? Did they call their friends? Did they read? Did they study their Bible? .... Today we saw a young girl with tattoos all over her body, at least the parts of her body that we could see, from her legs up to and on her face. She really looked gross when she could have looked very attractive. Why would she want to look like that? .... Why can't most women shop without talking on their cell phones while they do so? .... Saturday afternoon I purchased a potted tomato plant at a local "reputable" farm market. By Monday morning the leaves all had white splotches on them. I took a few leaves back to the market and they said they couldn't do anything about it for me. What could I have done to that plant in 40 hours? Why would I go back there to buy from them again? .... If your family has trouble paying your bills, why can't you just be allowed to "raise taxes" rather than cut your expenses? Isn't that what our government does? How big do you think our tax increase will be in Pennsylvania this year? .... Oh well, that's enough for today. Guess I'll go back to watching the Phillies lose again ... at home.

The Century Mark

Ten months ago I began posting this blog on this public site that gives me a wider audience and a little more flexibility than my other site.  I just realized that this is now my 100th blog on this public site.   So happy anniversary to me.  And thanks to the few of you who regularly read these ramblings of an old guy on either of my sites.  I guess my last few blogs have been a little on the heavy side since we have been going through some troubled times in our lives lately.  Thank you to those of you who've hung in there with me through this time.  So, I thought maybe for number 100 I should try another angle, a more positive one.  During my teaching years I began to make a collection of humorous stories that I would often use in my classes.  Now I use them when I lead hymn sings or do other public presentations.  My collection now has grown beyond a single large notebook.  last week I heard Chuck Swindoll share one from my collection, one which remains one of my favorites.  I may have also shared this before, several years ago.  If I did, be patient with me - you know I am getting old and I repeat myself.  You know I am getting old and I repeat myself.   "A couple from up north decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out from an icy winter.  They planned to stay at the same hotel where they had spent their honeymoon 20 years ago.  Because they both had jobs they found it difficult to coordinate their travel schedules.  So it was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on Thursday and his wife would follow the next day.  Upon checking in, the husband found that the room had a computer so he decided to send an e-mail back to his wife.  Unfortunately, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address when he sent it.  In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral.  He had been a minister for many years before suffering a massive heart attack.  Expecting some messages of sympathy from relatives and friends she decided to check her e-mail.  When she opened the first message, she fainted!  The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and then saw the computer screen which read:  To: My Loving Wife, Subject: I've Arrived!  I know you are surprised to hear from me but they have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones.  I've just arrived and have checked in.  I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.  Looking forward to seeing you then!  Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.  P.S.  Sure is hot down here!   ...........  have a good day and be careful of those e-mail addresses!

Zap!

After a very dry winter we have hit a string of days with showers - some very heavy - and scattered storms.  Some storms have been severe and even flash flood warnings have been posted.  But the other day it looked as though the dark clouds had finally parted and the sun finally came out.  But as I stepped outside suddenly there was a flash of lightning and a loud boom.  The "zap" seemed to come out of the blue and certainly wasn't expected.  But isn't that the way life often is for each of us?  Right now it is 4 am and I've been unable to sleep all night.  We have been going through some "stormy" situations the last few months and then it began to appear that things were finally settling down and the "sun might be shining" once again.  But then, several hours ago, there was another unexpected "zap" and a new challenge has come my way.  I tried to sleep, but couldn't.  I spent time praying and asking the Lord for wisdom.  But sleep hasn't come.  Since midnight I've updated the church giving records, prepared labels for an Awana mailing list, answered some e-mails, and worked on paying bills.  Now I don't need any sermons, I know my trust is in the Lord.  I know I shouldn't worry.  But it would be so much easier if I could just pick up the phone, ask God personally what to do, and get a quick answer.   I know He knows all about this and has the future planned and under His control.  But, ...   And someday I'll look back and be amazed how He guided me through this problem.  But in the meantime ...   Well, we need the rain to restore our water table and we are thankful for the downpours we've been experiencing.  And I guess I need the zaps and storms of life for my spiritual growth so I should be thankful.  At least the Lord must think so!  But it would be nice to have a sunny season for a change.  In everything give thanks.  So my personal prayer continues to be for wisdom (and I really need that now), peace, and strength ... and maybe even some sleep.

Junk Mail

When my father passed away I arranged to have all of his mail forwarded to me.  I understand that the Post Office will do this for first class mail for one year.  This is important because of the need to get all of dad's bills as well as all of his mail for our denomination for which he served as financial secretary.  We have been working hard to get all of these addresses officially changed to be sent to me rather than to be forwarded.  This has been working and many of these addresses are now changed.  However, the Post Office has a shorter period for forwarding other mail - most of which I really don't want.  But something strange has happened.   All of what I term as "junk mail" has had its addresses changed and it is now also coming to me.  I certainly didn't ask for this to happen and I don't want it.  I guess it must be one of those "services" the Postal Service provides, on their own, to keep the mail coming.  Now most of these junk items are requests for money.  And my dad gets plenty of these - I think we really average three of four of these a day.  And that is an honest estimate.  And then there are the fancy address labels - he gets two or three sets of these a week with my address on them.  And I don't know how to get this all stopped - they'll probably keep coming even after I pass on.  They all include envelopes to return your gift, but you must use a stamp, so it will cost me money to tell them to stop their mailings.  Maybe I should just humor the Post Office and return them without stamps and flood their dead letter center.  I guess it is all part of the society of waste where we kill the trees and fill the landfills.  So thank you U. S. Postal Service for keeping the "junk mail" flowing to my home!

A Vacation To Forget

It has been two years since we were able to take a vacation.  We have been to Pinebrook quite often during that time, but that is always to work and I don't call that a vacation.  We haven't been able to get away for any length of time because of my duties every Sunday in church and our duties on Wednesday nights in Awana.  And we don't have a cabin or a get-away close by to go that doesn't cost us a great deal of money.  And finally, our family problems since last October have kept us fully involved in caring for others.  So, knowing that we really needed to get away, and since yesterday was our wedding anniversary, we planned a trip for much of this week. We left after completing my Sunday morning commitments.  But, I guess in this modern age one should not take a computer for e-mail (we operate our church e-mail prayer chain) or a cell phone if one really needs to relax.  Well we did have a nice time on Monday, enjoying a few relaxing hours time at the bay.   But numerous cell phone calls and e-mails informed us of a variety of problems involving unexpected family health problems, numerous estate settlement problems, and several other things that needed our attention.  Then some physical problems prevented us from doing what we had planned on the remaining days.  So, Tuesday morning we gave up and drove home to deal with some of the problems and to see our family doctor.  Now I admit that I was extremely disappointed since we had looked forward to this time and needed this time away.  And I also admit that I wrestled with God, especially while driving home.  Why would He allow these things to happen when we needed time away?  Didn't He think we had enough on our plate right now?   Couldn't we just have a break in the stress?  Was He even hearing our prayers and concerns?  I felt a little like David did when in Psalm 13 he wrote, "How long, O LORD?  Will you forget me forever?  How long will you hide your face from me?  How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart?  How long will my enemy triumph over me?"  Maybe there are times that you've reached this point, too.  It was a vacation and an anniversary to forget.  But later that night I recalled God's faithfulness in the past and the knowledge that "He encircles my path and my lying down with His care and that He knows ALL my ways" (Psalm 139:3)  And then I also remembered David's response in Psalm 13.  "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me."  So we did get some things accomplished on our return home.  We got to the doctor and scheduled a number of follow-up tests.  We were still able to catch a quick "anniversary dinner" at Dennys and I even had a coupon - not very romantic, but we were together.  And today I was able to cut grass and we made great progress on cleaning out my dad's house. I was able to finally schedule my surgery in July.  And we just learned that we need a new refrigerator.  So coming home wasn't a total waste, I guess.  And it was good we were home - this morning we even received a call from a friend who thought we were away - at 8:30.  Now if we had been on vacation we would have probably still been sleeping in bed, so I guess it was good we were home instead to take the call.  But we do know that God is in control, even when things don't go the way we had hoped.  God is good, all the time (even on vacations you want to forget)! 

Commitment

Is commitment becoming a lost character trait?  I hear stories about community organizations and service groups who are having trouble operating because older members are no longer well enough to serve and younger folks won't join or make a commitment.  Many churches have similar problems with uncommitted laypersons so often professional help must be hired to provide services - just look at the growing size of church staffs.  Now part of it is the economy and the increase in the number of working women.  Family lives have changed.  But part of it is also our desires for "material things" and recreation.  Many younger folks just don't want to be tied down - they want to head to the shore, or the mountains, or the parks when they aren't working.  Faithfulness to the church and worship services is no longer a priority - commitment is lacking in my estimation.  Now not everything is that way.  We have worked with our Awana program for 27 years and we have had many committed leaders.  In fact we have 26 who have served 15 or more years.  Of these 19 have served for 20 or more years and 8 of these for 25 or more years.  That is commitment.  And most of our 80 staff members each year are there to serve almost every Wednesday night.   Now maybe it is also a generational thing.  We know of a church softball team where some members voted against using a league rule that would have allowed them to add a few nonchurch players to their roster.  I can't fault their vote as long as those voting were willing to be faithful and committed to the team.  So what happened?  Well many of these players have left their team down by not being faithful.  They all had the game schedule before the season began so they could have made a commitment to arrange their personal schedules to be there.  But most nights they have had to play without some regulars and a few times they have not even had any extra players available.  For one key game, against the team that had tied them for first place, five starters and several substitutes failed to show up.  As a result, the team had to play their coach to field a team and they were forced to play this key game with only nine instead of ten players.  So I wonder if commitment is becoming a lost trait, especially with the younger generation.  I was always taught that if I gave my word to be part of a team, or an outreach, or a church ministry, I was to give 100%.  Anything less was unacceptable.  It is even worse if this lack of commitment should involve unfaithfulness in attending, giving, or serving in a ministry.  Then the judge of our commitment is not a teammate or a friend or an observer, but the Lord!

Special Results

If you look hard enough, you can always find some special blessings in times of difficulty.   This year my sister has had to transport and pick up her grandson as he attended afternoon kindergarten.  That has meant a daily roundtrip from Lancaster to Lititz and two hours of waiting for him until school is over.  But those two hours gave her a special chance to spend time each day with dad at his house.  These were special times that she wouldn't have normally had and she didn't realize then how soon dad would be taken home.  When dad began to have health problems in the fall I was often able to join them when we weren't running to Selinsgrove to take care of Dianne's dad.  I usually took dad for medical appointments and blood transfusions but my sister was able to share with some of this.  Even though Terry was not in good health, there were times that he also was able to visit.  Little did we know how soon these special times would end.  After dad's death in February we began to spend almost everyday together cleaning out his house.  I almost feel that I have been living there since that time.  Sometimes Terry was able to visit, although he was too weak to help and would often sit or lay down while we worked and talked. It was special just to have him there.  Sometimes we were also able to visit with him during our time in Lititz.  But as we now reflect upon the past few months we realize that in our times of sadness and concern, the Lord allowed us all to have many special times together that wouldn't have happened otherwise.  These are times and memories that we now cherish.  It is amazing how God can provide special blessings even in very difficult times ... during these times I also had a chance to once again appreciate the very special town of Lititz.  It is a unique community and I do miss living there.  And, on a lighter side, I rediscovered Root's Auction which is only open on Tuesdays.  My drive home each Tuesday took me past this unique auction with its hundreds of stands and many bargains.  I found the best subs I ever had and great bargains on fresh fruits and vegetables and plants. It is just relaxing to walk around and observe the sights and smells of this unusual Lancaster County jewel.   And, yesterday in the drizzle and cold weather, Dianne and I enjoyed hot french fries from Finks!   What a delicious break from the days of stress.  God is so good to us in so many unique ways, but sometimes we allow the clouds of problems to hide his goodness to us.   (P.S. - One of my readers also solved my Facebook problem that I shared on Monday. It's good to know that somebody does read my blog.  Thanks!)

I Wonder ...

There are some things I wonder about ...  Where have all the sparrows suddenly come from?  For the past year our birds seemed to have disappeared and then, suddenly, a few weeks ago, flocks of sparrows invaded our feeders.  Often we now have eight to ten feeding at one time.  And they are running up my bill as they gobble up my bird food.  They are more like pigs than birds!  ...   Why do banks and investment firms make it so hard to take out your money?  It has taken us months and dozens of forms and even gold medallion signatures to get trust funds released to pay bills.  And we have found that others have the same problems.  I guess they just don't want to give up their funds ...  Why do national and international leaders continue to give meaningless warnings to countries developing nuclear weapons?  It's like telling your kids not to do something, twenty times ... Why aren't there any good family programs on television anymore?  Won't folks watch shows that don't include sex, swearing, and violence? ...  Why do Bradford and Norman Rockwell collector plates no longer have any value?  You can't even give them away ... Why do we need more shopping center/plazas when large centers like Park City, whose owners happen to be bankrupt, have more and more empty stores? ... Now here is a big one - How do you take friends off your friends list on Facebook?  There used to be a page to do this but it appears that they've changed it and eliminated that choice.  So are you stuck with your friends forever or is there a way to quietly remove them if you change your mind? (Please help me out if you know the answer) ... so those are some of my weighty concerns on a slow Monday ... oh yes, I also wonder will Moyer last four innings for the Phillies tonight?  I feel for him.  Poor guy is learning what many of us have already learned, it's not easy getting old.  So stay young!  Hope you had a nice Memorial Day.

A Very Special Breed

I remember it well.  It was October of 1967.  We received word from annual conference that John Dunn was assigned to be our new pastor in Lancaster.  Now I knew of John Dunn.  He was a short man with a deformed arm who had only served rather small churches.  I admit that I was disappointed.  But the Lord was really in the assignment despite my personal reaction.  John Dunn turned out to be a very special servant of the Lord.  He was not a great speaker in the pulpit, but he loved people and had a real heart for the ministry.  He was one of a special breed, a vanishing breed, of men who served the Lord faithfully even when times were tough and financial rewards very limited.  He knew how to work hard, how to visit, how to encourage, and how to help folks going through difficult trials.  His arm was no handicap.  He drove his car, he took care of the parsonage and he annually had a very large garden.  A few years his garden produced so many cantaloupes that he hosted the congregation after the Sunday night service for a cantaloupe party. He could also play a wicked game of ping pong.   In fact, after a few months if some visitor would comment about his arm, we had to think twice about what they were even talking about.  During his 12 years as pastor our church we grew and we expanded our facilities.  He was instrumental in establishing a bus ministry which reached hundreds of children.  He was a major influence in the lives of many, including me.   He encouraged me to take leadership roles and supported me as I did.  In 1979 he retired.  Then in 1980 we invited him back to be our Pastor of Visitation. And, he worked so well with our new, young pastor.  There was no competition or jealousy over the ministry of his replacement, as there have been in many similar situations with other men.  And with his love of the Lord, one would have not expected anything different.  In 1987 he retired again and this time he and his wife Dell moved to Florida where he was active in the ministry at the retirement center, Park of the Palms.   His wife was taken home to heaven a few years ago and on Wednesday, Pastor Dunn, was also called home.  He will be missed.  He was one of a vanishing breed of faithful servants of the Lord.  He was one of those very special people who was an influence in my spiritual life.  I thank the Lord for allowing him to be part of my life.  Now he is home with the Lord, and Dell, and my mother and dad, and my brother Terry, and Gary and Ralph and so many others who he served.  And he's heard the welcome, "Well done, good and faithful service!"

The Democratic Way

I am sitting in our voting precinct, trying to keep awake.  I am Judge of Elections and am responsible for making sure all the rules and government regulations are followed.  When we close tonight at 8 pm I will have absentee ballots to handle, dozens of forms to complete and envelopes lettered A to Z to stuff with forms.  That is in addition to running several tapes on the three machines and completing four final report forms.  Then we will pack up all the booths, machines, tables, signs and I will drive to Lancaster to turn in all the data.  I've been here since 6 this morning and will get home tonight about 10.  Usually I am swamped with work and the hours go quickly.  During the presidential election we processed over 2,000 voters.  But today is totally different and it is sad.  It is just about 4 pm and we have processed a grand total of 60 voters.  Did you get that?  In nine hours we have had only 60 voters.  Now I realize that there aren't any great contests and it is just a primary but it is sad for me to realize that less than 100 voters are interested enough to express their opinion in the selection of local officials.  And while we often get upset and critical about our leaders,  maybe we get what we deserve.  Wake up Americans - voting is a privilege in a democracy but also a responsibility.  Did you vote?  If not, why not?   Too busy?  Uninformed?   Uninterested?  Is there really a good reason for not doing so?    If I've "scuffed your shine, so be it!"   Well, I voted and I will do my job until we are done tonight because as a citizen of this country I feel it is my obligation and duty - a privilege many have died to preserve.

Psalm 16

In memory of my brother, Terry Kauffman.  Here is his favorite scripture.  Psalm 16, A psalm of David.  (1) Keep me safe, O God, for I have come to you for refuge.  (2) I said to the LORD, "You are my Master!  Every good thing I have comes from you." (3) The godly people in the land are my true heroes!  I take pleasure in them!  (4) Troubles multiply for those who chase after other gods.  I will not take part in their sacrifices of blood or even speak the names of their gods.  (5) LORD, you alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing.  You guard all that is mine.  (6) The land you have given me is a pleasant land.  What a wonderful inheritance!  (7) I will bless the LORD who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me.  (8) I know the LORD is always with me.  I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.  (9) No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice.  My body rests in safety.  (10) For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave.  (11) You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.   (New Living Translation) 

One More ...

My grandfather used to sing a song that said, "We are going down the valley one by one, with our faces toward the setting of the sun ..."  And the reality of this has certainly been in my mind recently.  During the past four years four of my closest friends have walked down the valley of death and been taken home to heaven.  First it was Norm Zellers, then Gary Varner, then Ralph Michel and now yesterday, my brother, Terry.   While I know that all four are in heaven, it is so hard to lose real life-long friends.  Their deaths were all so hard to take, but Terry's is the hardest.  It hurts.  We were always close.  We enjoyed being with each other. He was always so positive, even when he was suffering in his final days.   He had a strong Christian testimony and encouraged so many people.  He had wisdom and always had ways to solve problems.  He was always willing to help me.  I have so many memories ... sharing the mumps in Elizabethtown  ... enjoying our dog Frisky ... Christmas trips to Bethlehem ... walking to school with him up N. Queen St. in Lancaster ... stitches and broken bones ... playing baseball in the backyard ... trying to nail together a broken tree ... enjoying Cho-Chos in Sunbury ... waiting in line together to buy a television for nine cents ... camping at Mizpah Grove ... coaching his Teener baseball team ... getting pinned by him when we wrestled ... watching his football team win the league championship ... cheering him on as he wrestled in tournaments and in college  ... working together picking cherries ... laying down a squeeze bunt that scored him from third to win a church softball game ... taking our kids to Long's Park ... using his car to take a trip to Indiana when we were having trouble with our car ... working with him in Awana ... serving on the elder board together ... trips together, especially to Williamsburg  ...  going to a Penn State football game with him ... spending New Year's Day together at dad's ... Sunday lunches at  Wendys ... dealing together with mother's sudden death ... checking on dad at times when we couldn't find him ... and so much more.  Good memories are so important, but there is now a void in my heart that will never again be filled.   I do thank the Lord that he took him peacefully yesterday while we sang hymns around his bed in the hospital.  We were singing "When We All Get To Heaven" as he breathed his last breath here on earth and was ushered into the presence of the Lord.  And I hope that he had the chance upon his arrival to wish mother, "Happy Mother's Day!".  I thank the Lord for the 63 years that I had the chance to have him as my brother and I look forward to sharing again with him throughout eternity.  For it is true, we are going down the valley one by one. 

Things I Wish That I Could Do

So often we take things for granted until we can no longer do them.  Then all we can do is wish.  Right now there are a number of things that I really wish I could do, especially tomorrow.  I wish I could call my mother and tell her what is happening in my life and see how things are going with her.  I wish I could send her some beautiful flowers.  I wish I could give her a special Mother's Day card.  I wish I could sit with her in church and then take her out for a nice meal.  I wish I could talk to her about her mother and learn more about my heritage.  I wish I could ask her to make me some of her special macaroni salad and apricot cake.  I wish that I could hug her and tell her how much I loved her. I wish that I could give her a kiss.  I wish that I could once more say "Happy Mother's Day!"   But I can't.  Those opportunities are gone forever.   Now instead I struggle with giving away her possessions and selling her house, and that is so hard.  And although she is much happier in heaven, living without pain, and reunited with dad, there is a void in my heart - especially at this time of the year.  And for the first time I realize that I am really now an orphan and now the elder in my family. I don't like that thought, but I can't change it.  Life changes so quickly.  So if you are still privileged to have a living mother, please do all the things that I now wish that I could still do.  You might now have the same opportunity a year from now.  Don't delay - do it now.  Don't live with regrets.  Have a Happy Mother's Day.

Things Most Others Never See

Today we had to drive to New Holland and I was reminded of the many sights that we in Lancaster County take for granted.  We saw miles of beautiful farms and fertile land.   We saw clothes lines filled with clothing, most of which was purple and black.  We saw farmers plowing their fields with their mules.  We saw windmills.  We saw a young man driving on the side of the highway with his open buggy.  We saw a young lady riding her bicycle with a large cart attached to the back - probably headed to a store.  We saw several signs for home-made furniture.  We saw produce stands that will soon be filled with beautiful fresh fruits and vegetables.  We saw beautiful flowers.  But one of the most exciting things that we saw was a large group of men participating in a barn raising.  It was a relaxing and interesting drive.  And it was also a sad reminder of a special culture which is shrinking in the midst of a growing Lancaster County culture which is now marked by drugs and crime.  On the way home we drove through Lancaster City - what a sad contrast!   Lancaster County has been changing drastically, but if you look you can still find a beautiful, simpler lifestyle.  Not all change is good.

It's Dad's Car!

My father was a good driver, even though he was 91.  In fact, the day after he died he received a letter from the Department of Transportation saying that they would renew his license since his family doctor and eye doctor had approved.  But dad had a number of unfortunate situations where his cars would be bumped or dented, most of the times by others.  So his cars often had numerous small dents and sometimes he would even buy a new car rather than have them repaired.  He was always reluctant to let me know about the dents since he thought I might blame him and suggest that he give up driving.   Well, a few months before his death, he was called by his Toyota dealer and given an outstanding trade deal to upgrade to a 2009.  The plans now are that in a few weeks the car will be mine and we have been using it some to keep it in good running condition.  On Thursday we were parked in a plaza lot in the end spot of a row.   We were just getting into dad's car when we saw this elderly lady make a U-turn heading right towards us.  Unfortunately, she didn't have enough room to complete her illegal turn and I stood there and watched as she scraped dad's car.   She had seen a parking spot in a row behind us and was turning to head for it.  So the car wasn't even mine yet and it had its first dent.   She got her cards out for me and I noticed that she was still in drive.  I could just see her butting us again, so I suggested that she put it in park.  Her insurance company suggested that I get an estimate for what I thought was just a little scratch.  The estimate - $500 - and two days in the shop!  Today, on my way to get the estimate, I stopped at Turkey Hill for gas.  They have 8 rows with a total of 16 pumps and I was the only customer.  Because it was raining, I didn't pull to the front pump in my row because I would have been directly in the heavy rain.  I had just completed pumping when I saw this driver - another elderly woman - pull up beside me.  She was so close that I was sure she was going to scrape me, but, PTL she didn't.  Then I guess she decided that either she couldn't get out of her door because she was too close to me or that her tank was on the wrong side.  So she decided to pull over in front of me - 15 vacant pumps and she wanted the one in front of me, in the rain.  I watched with fear as she slowly cut in front of me, just missing the front bumper of dad's car by a few millimeters.  PTL, somehow she missed again.  So there is no question, it is dad's car and people, especially elderly women, are still trying to hit it.  So if you see me driving a silver Toyota, complete with dents, please don't think that it is time to take my license away from me.  We Kauffmans just can't help it - it must be the car.   Maybe I should pad it with rubber.